It’s Nan’s funeral tomorrow. A large family gathering for the wrong reason. It will be the first funeral for my two youngest aged 9 and 12 too. Their first glimpse and insight into the inevitable. They have been tremendously lucky in their lives so far.
They’ve bought up randomly about where Nan might be, including sitting in a waiting room for us, to be being a new star. Children’s minds are a strange thing. I’ve welcomed their questions, which I really haven’t been able to answer! As an adult, I choose to believe her soul/spirit is now part of our universe, her body left behind which we must duly honour.
I’m reading a verse from a poem chosen by Nan herself alongside my sister and cousins. Nan requested no flowers but asked if donations could be collected for the RSPB Love Nature which will go towards the cost of an oak bench engraved with ‘Fred and Iris Burdett’ which will be sited at the Pagham Harbour Local Nature Reserve in West Sussex. I can feel my chest getting heavy when I think about the stress of the day and how emotional it’s no doubt going to be. My ‘miss’ for Nan continues in earnest and her void remains.
My parents have organised everything within an inch of Nan’s wishes, even ordering and collecting Nan’s beautiful Willow casket from a friend of mine Sussex Willow Coffins. It’s going to be a beautiful affair, I have no doubt.
Today’s possessions are Nan’s specs. How many pair of glasses does one person need? 5 apparently.
I’m actually going to adopt the pair marked ‘I Burdett’ as I adore them, with the other pairs being donated to the opticians to upcycle.